To the Hallowed Halls and Vine Draped Walls

So I'm graduating tomorrow. 4 years. It seems simultaneously like eons and like about 2 seconds. I have met so many incredible people here. Two of the best friends I will ever hope to find anywhere, people that have been there for me at every point of my college career. We have been through everything together. We've all seen each other at our lowest and highest. I honestly am not even sure I could have gotten through college without both of them there. I'm feeling uber nostalgic right now, which is probably natural and unfortunately girly (le barf). I just wish that there were words to express what this feels like. It's weird. It's scary. It's exciting. It just is.

So what do we do now? I feel like I'm missing something, like there is a piece to the puzzle that got lost in the move. I feel like there are things that I have needed to do that I forgot. I'm sleeping like shit and eating even worse. And tomorrow I graduate and then I'm just here. Floating. I'm not a student anymore and I will now feel a little pathetic writing BA English on job applications to restaurants.

I've also been getting the sense that I haven't done enough with my 4 years. I haven't really done anything but school and work. I feel like I need to have more experiences at this point in my life. I'm 22. Where did all the excitement go? I spent too much time being responsible, and now I have to be that constantly. But I don't want to go back either, because I'm burnt out. I'm tired of pulling all nighters and feeling guilty on the weekends for having fun instead of studying. And I'm tired of required reading. So this is all going to be better right?

I want this feeling to go away.

And to Katie and Haley: I love you. More than you could ever realize.